I dont feel.
thats just it, i dont feel happy, i dont feel sad, i dont feel guilt, i dont feel pride, i dont feel anything. I look around and am like blah. so what ? i have seen beauty, i have seen intelligence, love, kindness. and here's the sticky, upsetting, fucked up thing. I have seen it twice.
TWICE DAMMIT !!!!
from two extremely different, dynamic individuals. therein lies the problem. everything else, everyone else is so blah. so, so incomparable(sp?). so insignificant. and even that isnt what bothers me. its so indescribable. as much as i hate to admit this, i have always been a patient person. add in an unwillingness to just settle for whatever and there you have the reason for my current attitiude.
bp. what else have i ever been ?